This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
