I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
