Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
