craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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