He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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