Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
