White coat. Heels.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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