do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Randomize
