At least make sure they are 18
Why
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
