I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
