Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
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