there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
