So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
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