we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
