I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Four minutes until I can fart!
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
