tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Randomize
