I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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