Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
