Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
