Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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