Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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