Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
