Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
