We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I love having hate sex.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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