Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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