how can u be prego again
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize