One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
