i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
