Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
