By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Randomize
