4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
