You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
