You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Randomize
