Walk of Shame. In a state park.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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