i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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