people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
