The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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