we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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