yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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