Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
