Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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