Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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