is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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