She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
