So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Is Oprah even human
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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