Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
