I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
