we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
