Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
