Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
